// January 13th, 2012 // 2 Comments » // Balance, Children and Babies
You may have already seen this video from Nummies, but if you are a mom or about to be a mom, and you haven’t seen it yet, you should.
Nummies says, “We asked moms if they could go back to before their first baby, what would they tell themselves. These are their answers. Everyone in the video is a mom.”
// January 6th, 2012 // No Comments » // Balance, Children and Babies, Family
Ever read something, and it resounds so clearly within you that you think, “Wow. I could have written that”? Or, in my case, “Wow. I wish I had written that.” Well, Glennon from Momastery has written the blog post that I wish I had written. It rings so true for mommy’s who, in the midst of a toddler tantrum or a day of endless whining, feel guilty that they are not enjoying every moment of ever day. I mean, let’s be honest . . . who just loves cleaning up pee dribbles off the floor for the eleventy-thousandth time?
Read the article “2011 Lesson #2: Don’t Carpe Diem” and then come back here to “discuss” it (I shared this post on Facebook, but I’m reposting it here for my readers who don’t follow Nix9t05 on FB.)
Done? Okay . . .
I wouldn’t trade being a mommy for anything, but there are times when it’s really, really hard. I have never begrudged anyone who told me to “enjoy this time,” because I don’t take it as “enjoy trying to manhandle your alternately limp and completely rigid child into a carseat.” I take it more as enjoying “time” in the Kairos sense of the word. I take it a support that, if can just make it through trying to get an overtired and whining to stop fighting his nap and for-the-love-of-Pete-go-to-sleep-already, there is a silver lining awaiting me. A cherished Kairos time.
However, there are times when I feel very, very guilty about not enjoying every single minute. I know women who have lost their pregnancies, lost their babies, lost their young children, or never even had the opportunity to have children, and I think, “What she wouldn’t give to be scrubbing dried spaghetti sauce off the floor. Again,” or “She would be more than thrilled to be reading the really poorly written dump truck book over and over and over and . . .” And I feel so guilty.
But let’s be real. Even these women who would give anything to have a baby, or to have their baby back, wouldn’t just love every moment. They wouldn’t be tickled pink to see their children lying right down and throwing a slobbering fit in the shoe aisle at Target because the Cowboy Woody shoes aren’t available in the needed size, and mommy can’t just INVENT the right size, now, can she?
No. They would give anything for the Kairos. That beautiful, blissful time that makes all the other stuff worthwhile.
It does go fast. Except for those moments that seem to last forever–when your patience is insufficient to meet the current demand and your child’s tantrum has exceeded your capacity for tolerating whining. But this too shall pass.
Hang in there, mommas. If you can make it through this meal, this fit, this mess, this embarrassment, this endless playlist of Cedarmont Kids, you’ve got a little Kairos coming your way.
It’s hard. But it’s so worth it.
// December 20th, 2011 // No Comments » // Balance, Family, Life in General
We recently had a discussion on the Nix9to5 Facebook page about crazy things people say to pregnant women and mothers. It started out kind of funny, but then really got me to thinking about how much judgment we as mothers place on each other’s parenting choices: breast/bottle, front facing/extended rear facing, spanking/time out, co-sleeping/cry-it-out . . . an on and on and on.
And then I saw this list entitled “How to Feel Miserable as an Artist.” As you read this list, substitute “Mother” for “Artist,” and make other related substitutions–”client/customer/gallery owner/patron/investor” could be “child/grandparents/in-laws/teachers/neighbors/nosy lady at the grocery store” or whoever else is applicable in your life:
Being a good mother really is an art. Each day we sculpt a life a little more, helping to shape a person that must eventually shape himself or herself. It’s an important art. It’s a wonderful art. Let us not make ourselves miserable by bowing to the judgment of others and holding ourselves to the impossible goal of perfection. Love and be loved and be a mom.
// December 8th, 2011 // No Comments » // Balance, Crafty Stuff
A couple of months ago, I wrote about my infatuation with homemade bath and body products when I told you about the DIY pore strips. While I think the full-face pore mask was fairly effective, it was also extremely painful and it smelled truly awful. I mean, I can’t say enough about how terrible it smells. One Nix9to5 reader even tagged me on Facebook as she tried the mask, saying, “Oh, why didn’t I listen to you about how badly this smells.” She went on to ponder whether it was possible to throw up without cracking her face. And removal didn’t go so well for her, either, as it was excruciating and left red splotches on her face. (Think you’re woman enough to conquer the homemade pore strip torture? Get the recipe here.)
Today I want to tell you about a kinder, gentler mask. This one does not rip the hairs out of your face, and it smells lovely. In fact, it smells like Christmas and would be the perfect way to pamper yourself and take a break from holiday stress. I found the recipe for Miracle Mask (via Pinterest, of course) on College Fashion–you know, because I still think I’m 20 and all.
Miracle Mask
Enjoy.// December 6th, 2011 // No Comments » // Balance, Life in General, Work at Home
When I first started Nix9to5, my tagline was “Nic’s Guide to Nixing the 9 to 5.” The focus of my blog was how to achieve the goal of becoming a work at home mom. Since then, my focus has changed. No longer am I concerned about being able to become a WAHM, but rather being able to stay a WAHM. Mostly, I’m just trying to manage my time and maintain my sanity. The blog posts are no longer just about working from home and saving money, but they are about all aspects of working from home–entertaining toddlers and young children, time management for work and household duties, and trying to carve out a little time for oneself along the way.
I’ve said before that I think the Nix9to5 blog has lost focus over the last year, but really, I think it has just shifted its purpose. No longer is this blog about figuring out how to nix the 9 to 5, but it is about making it work as a work at home mom–which inspired the new tagline for Nix9to5.
I’ll continue writing about the “Work” in Work at Home Mom–opportunities, tips, budgeting, and strategies–but I’ll also be writing a lot about the “Mom” in Work at Home Mom. From child-centric activities to date nights, from housekeeping and cooking to relaxation and leisure, I’ll be writing about everything that goes into finding and maintaining balance as a Work at Home Mom.
I’m excited about this new phase of my work-at-home journey and about the new direction Nix9to5 has taken. I hope that all of my readers–not just WAHMs–will find something of value here.
Now let’s get to work.
// September 13th, 2011 // No Comments » // Balance, Time Management
I joined a Mom’s Group that began today. The first class talked about time management and priorities, which, if you’ve ever read this blog before, you know I need. The lesson today didn’t teach me anything new or earth-shattering, but it certainly put things into a perspective I could understand.
To begin the class, we watched a video from Andy Stanley‘s “Time of Your Life” series. In this video, Stanley gave a demonstration of how when we prioritize correctly, all of those things we think we don’t have time for suddenly seem to fit. I wanted to share a clip of the video with you, but I couldn’t find it. I did, however, find another blog that had its own pictures of the demonstration, so I’m going to share them with you (providing attribution and hoping that the author doesn’t mind me sharing with you). (more…)
// September 4th, 2011 // 2 Comments » // Balance, Life in General
Being a work at home mom means having a lot of responsibilities. Unlike mothers who work outside the home, WAHMs are responsible for watching/caring for/entertaining the kids all day as well as earning a paycheck. Unlike SAHMs who aren’t otherwise employed, WAHMs are responsible for earning a paycheck as well as watching/caring for/entertaining the kids all day. Now, before my readers who work outside the home get offended, and before my readers who do not have a paying job get offended, I don’t think any of us has it easy, and I’m certainly not saying that I have it harder than anyone else. We each have unique rewards and unique challenges, regardless of our situation.
Because of so many responsibilities, women often feel like they fail to measure up to some standard they have set for themselves–or maybe even a standard that has been imposed on them. We often strive for a perfection that is unattainable.
Here are the things I generally think I need to accomplish every single day in order to be the best wife/mother/employee/person I can be: (more…)
// June 13th, 2011 // No Comments » // Balance, Children and Babies, Life in General, Organization, Time Management, Work at Home
Score for Two Days:
Well, I thought I wasn’t getting anything accomplished, but looking at this list makes me feel a little better. Even though I am woefully behind, I am making progress, I guess.
// May 23rd, 2011 // No Comments » // Balance, Work at Home
Work at home mom, stay at home mom, working mom . . . no matter what you call yourself, there is one title that surely fits most of us: Overwhelmed Mom. I’ve been doing a pretty good job of keeping up with the Nix9to5 blog lately, but today I’m just feeling buried beneath a mountain of stresses and To-Dos. A broken dishwasher has added financial stress and relegated us to *gasp* handwashing dishes for a week. We’re completely out of cat litter . . . and toilet paper. We have no fruit, except for some black bananas that need to become banana bread or hit the freezer today. My work list, thankfully, is growing, but I have a client who is delinquent in payment right now–which brings me back to financial stress. I’m struggling with a bout of insomnia–I can’t sleep because I’m stressed out, and because I’m exhausted, the littlest things send me over the edge.
So. I’m cutting today’s post short and letting some Overwhelmed Mommy Experts take over.
From BlogHer is an article called “Overwhelmed Moms Confess.” It talks about the Real Live Dangers of being overwhelmed and is practically a blogroll of overwhelmed mommies. I’ll let them take over from here: Overwhelmed Moms Confess
// May 20th, 2011 // No Comments » // Balance, Children and Babies
One of the most common tips I hear for stay at home moms and work at home moms is to be sure to schedule some adult playdates (that sounds SO dirty, but not what I mean at all). It is important to maintain connections with friends, and to go do things together that do not involve discussions of diapers, poop, toddler eating habits, or rashes.
Last night, a couple of girlfriends and I redeemed a Groupon for Wine and Canvas. Wine and Canvas is a three hour art class held at participating restaurants in which participants paint a replica of a famous work of art. Despite the title, wine is not included–if you do not drink, you will still be welcome at one of these events and will not be uncomfortable. They even offer “Cookies and Canvas,” a children’s art class for ages 5 through 5th grade.
Johnny Carino’s was the host of last night’s Wine and Canvas event, and my friends and I–none of us with any experience painting anything other than walls–met to recreate Claude Monet’s Sunset in Venice:
I thought an impressionist painting might be the way to go, since things like straight lines are a challenge for me. This is how my painting turned out:
I think I may have found a new career in art forgery, no?
Here I am with the girls, showing off our masterpieces:
I’m sure we will all be displaying our art prominently over our fireplace mantles . . . or burning them in the fireplace. Whichever.
We had a great time, and even if I don’t think any of us are going to quit our jobs and move to Paris to become famous artists, I think we were all surprised at how well our first painting attempts turned out.
If you’re looking for something different to do, I recommend Wine and Canvas, which is available in Oklahoma City and Indianapolis. I think there are similar events in cities around the nation. The participants were a diverse group and included girlfriends, sisters, couples, and even a few guys that weren’t dragged there by their wives. It’s a good way to exercise your creative side and try something new without having to venture too far outside your comfort zone. The girls and I had a great time and plan on doing it again.
Visit the Wine and Canvas website or check out Wine and Canvas OKC on Facebook for more information.
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